I have personally deteremined that there are four types of snowboarders.

The constant newb, you can find them doing the falling leaf ALL the way down the mountain, but often are dressed to the nines with the matching outfit. They are likely too hard headed, or stubborned to take lessons, or take advice from people with the best intentions, and think that they’re being yelled at all the time.

The amateur expert, they’ve conquered the black diamonds, have all the latest equipment and often burn down the bunny slopes with total disregard to the newbs, and think they have some sort of reason of being inside the the freestyle park. They are often gathered in large groups around one small table top, that the majority will not have enough speed to reach the transitions.

Then there’s the casual professional, they have no real life job skills, but have the freedom to spend the entire ski season to work at a ski resort, and board every chance that they can. They hail from all over the world, drink heavily, and have the shortest term memory. You can often meet them on ski lifts, and are easily identifiable because they reek of pot, and shorten all words into one syllable equivalences.

Finally there’s the idiot adventurers, they need to travel to new resorts to obtain some sort of high that can only be reached by spending way too much money to do things that their bodies weren’t really made to do in the first place. Surprisingly some are very well spoken, and do very little damage to their body in the form of alcohol, drugs, or sex.

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